The Braxtons
I’m really not a pack rat even though I’ve been hanging on to one particular pair of jeans for about 15 years. The Braxtons.
I bought The Braxtons at a thrift store when I was a teenager because I thought they were cool. They have TRIPLE gold stitching going down the legs and around the back yoke. Cool designs on the pockets which I’m sure inspired the 7 Jeans designers. A red little tag with a lion on it peeking out on the hip seam. Best of all they have this unique little beauty mark on the butt where someone dropped a drop of bleach.
Back in those days I wasn’t brave enough to wear a long skirt to try on pants underneath while hiding behind the racks of musty clothes in thrift shops. These days I have no shame. Or class. So I bought The Braxtons sure they would fit. That wasn’t the case. “I will fit into these someday,” I thought and put them away. Over the next few years I would periodically try them on. No luck. I even took The Braxtons with me to sunny California when I moved for college but still no luck. In fact, over the ensuing years they got smaller and smaller.
Last year I pulled out all my old pants and discovered that just because the shoe fits doesn’t necessarily mean you should wear it. However, The Braxtons were one pair that still didn’t fit. So while I gave away all my other “keepers” I tenderly folded up The Braxtons and hid them in the back of my closet with hope. But this morning in a moment of confidence I pulled them out and was overcome with a mix of loving familiarity, hope, triumph, and disgust. The Braxtons fit!!! But they looked ridiculous. Beyond ridiculous.
For years I’ve imagined one day being able to fit in The Braxtons. I would wear them proudly strutting around in my flip flops. (Because flip flogs are perfect for strutting.) I imagined people would ask me questions like, “Wear did you get those jeans?? So cool!”. Or make statments like, “Those jeans look really good on you.” In my dreams. High waisted jeans are not for short people with thicker thighs and full bums and 8 inch zippers should be illegal.
I’m trying to decided what to do with the Braxtons.
As you can tell I’m rather attached to these old jeans although I’ve worn them once for about 5 minutes. Why? The Braxtons symbolize hope to me. I held onto to them out of belief one day I’d be able to fit into them. The symbolize determination and perseverance. It took me 15 years to be able to slide into them instead nearly passing out from exhaustion trying to hoist them over my thighs. I’m trying to decide what to do with The Braxtons. Thinking about taking them to a tailor to see if they can lower the rise and shorten the zipper. Or maybe I’ll just say screw it and wear them with pride. In either case I’ve decided to document this day with some very chic photos.
The Braxtons: Moody and Complicated.
The Braxtons: Intense.
The Braxtons: The "cat's" meow.
The Braxtons: Confident and Cool.
Hugs and High Fives,
Jenn
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This is my (almost) sane quest for insane health. Let's 
Any higher and you wouldn’t need a top. LOL That is very cool and not only do they fit, they look loose-ish. Yeah Braxtons!
LOL!!!! You’re are so stinkin’ FUNNY!!!
One word Jen… “Awesome!!!” You are awesome! I laughed so hard at those pics. Kudos to you for persevering and achieving your goal. I say get them tailored! You deserve it!
And Martha you are hilarious!
you just single handedly made my day!!!!!
PS: The pictures are seriously the best ever!
Thank guys!! I’m glad The Braxtons are bringing smiles to more faces than mine!
Martha – I’ll let you borrow The Braxtons for Saturday if you’d like!!!!
These pictures remind me of an awesome photo shoot of you and Reanna in mom’s garden. Except then you were wearing your silk hammer pants.
Ahhhhh the silk hammer pants. GOLD silk hammer pants nonetheless. I think that’s another post.
OMG – loved it! Hysterical! I say tailor the waistline and make them into cut-offs!
Dude. Hilarious.
OK, we’ve been friends for mumblemumble months now and I’ve been meaning to read this post for.ever. Now that I have and I’ve guffawed all of the cats out of the room, I’m sooo glad I did.
First of all: CONGRATS on fitting into them. And by NOW, they are probably hanging off of you.
Second, I was laughing hysterically at the photos- and of meow cow’s cameo- hope he didn’t charge you too much for that.
Third, do you even KNOW how ‘in’ boob-high jeans are these days? I’m not daring enough to wear them, but supposedly they are the beez-neez.
Fourth, if you just can’t do it (wear them, that is) there is a place that does that for a living (Ruff Cut) on Pico & Sepulveda. He specializes in Levis’s but I’m guessing that the zipper wouldn’t throw him for too much of a loop (ha, did I make a tailor-themed funny?).
Loved.this.post.
No I didn’t know boob-high jeans were in. My backside is not made for high waisted jeans. There is a reason I didn’t post pics from that angle. 😉
Wow. There are no words to describe how truly awesome and amazing this post is. Really. Those pictures speak for themselves.
This made me laugh out loud! Are those now considered ‘mom jeans’ ??
Congrats for finally getting into them — way to persevere!
I still have the Braxtons. Haha! They are totally mom jeans! 😀